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Television Recap: ‘The Bachelor’ Season Premiere

January 3, 2011
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So, ladies, did you watch the season premiere of the (15th!) season of The Bachelor? In an extremely controversial (but ultimately genius) move, ABC allowed Brad Womack to take a second stab at being the bachelor. Womack (season 11), if you recall, had the audacity to not pick either of the final girls, leaving them high and dry at the alter. He was dubbed “the most hated man in America” by bloggers almost immediately.

I’ll be honest, I wasn’t recapping the show at the time, and I did not see his whole season, but of course I read about the controversy surrounding the final episode.  I really didn’t see why everyone hated him so.  If he didn’t truly love either of them, why should he have proposed?  We all know that the success rate of the show is dismal.  Why should he have picked/proposed to one of the girls just to appease the audience?

My only reservations about Womack taking another go of it is that there is no way he can pull that again, and I think he might pick someone just to pick someone. You know?

At any rate, the two-hour show spent the first half hour or so trying to convince us that Womack is truly a changed man (and featuring as many shots of him shirtless as possible).  After the finale, his world was shattered, blah, blah, he didn’t leave his house, blah, blah.  He has been in therapy for three years trying to figure out why he was a commitment-phobe.  According to Womack, it all came down to Daddy issues. Womack had an unreliable father presence when he was growing up, so he has abandonment issues.

I buy that.  Emotional scars can stay with you for a long time.  Womack’s therapist was even trotted out to emphatically state that Womack is well-equipped to fall in love. It all seemed a bit technical to me.  Where’s the romance?  Since when do you have to be equipped with tools to allow yourself to fall in love?

ABC did do a good job at manipulating Womack’s image.  Heck,  I even had a lump in my throat by the end of all the touchy-feely crap. Then they dragged out his rejectees, DeAnna Pappas and Jenni Croft. Womack had to make nice and grovel and say he was sorry.  He seemed sincere, but the whole dog and pony show was unnecessary filler.  Get on with the new season already!

Next, we got to see some short videos that featured some of the girls.  I love seeing all the goofy occupations.  Ashley H. is a dentist/bad dancer who embarrassed herself and her occupation by dancing in her underwear to show how “fun” she is. Raichel is a “manscaper”.  That is to say that she waxes the hair off of men for a living.  We even get to see her doing a brazilian on one fellow. Shawntel is a funeral director and embalmer. Chantal (yes, there were two named chantal, with different spellings) is an executive assistant for a string of car dealerships. There were the obligatory nannies and waitresses also.

Then we had Madison. Her claim to fame is that she is a model, and she has read Twilight way too many times, because she has fangs.  That’s right, fangs.  How fucking stupid, right?  She looks ridiculous, though she certainly thinks she is mysterious and interesting due to her proclivity for the adolescent mouth accessories. I couldn’t tell if she had veneers, or had her canines filed down, though I am leaning toward veneers. Either way, I can’t believe a grown man would find her remotely intriguing. She is stunt casting, pure and simple.

Emily

Emily has the most compelling story of anyone I can recall.  She is drop-dead gorgeous, but in a sweet  and wholesome way.  In 2004, she lost her fiance in a plane crash.  He was a professional race-car driver, and traveled frequently.  She didn’t go with him on that particular flight, because she felt ill.  The plane crashed, killing all ten occupants. A few days after the funeral, Emily found out she was pregnant with his child. She now has a six year old daughter named after her father. That’s some heavy stuff, and it will be interesting to see how Womack reacts when he is eventually told the story.  It’s a real heartbreaker.

There are 30 women total, and we roll through the arrivals.  Mind you, the women did not know who the bachelor was going to be, and some were pretty shocked to find that it was Womack.  However, quite a few were excited.  The very first woman to greet Womack is Chantal, who promptly slaps him across the face, saying that she represents all the women in America.  Ballsy move.

Overall, the group seems to be pretty sharp compared to other seasons, and they are all stunners.

Alli says she will be glad to extend a second chance to him. Ashley S. cops a feel of his ass before she heads to the house. Meghan (a fashion marketer) teeters about on some of the most hideous bright red shoes I have ever seen.  Jackie makes him pinkie swear he won’t break her heart.  The only ones I felt he had instant chemistry with are Emily and Michelle (a stunning single mom).

During the cocktail meet and greet, Womack is grilled incessantly by the women who are very leery of his intentions.  He mentions several times that he is getting beat down.  However, I felt like he handled himself well for the most part.

Some of the women chose bizarre behavior for their first time meeting the guy.  Raichel whipped out her waxing kit and proceeded to rip the hairs out Womack’s wrist (nothing says romance like a little wax job). Jackie sang to him (always embarrassing to watch).  Alli and Renee behaved like children, tugging him back and forth between them. Alli then proceeded to tell him how she was dumped because a guy thought her junk in the trunk was a bit much.  Who would announce that right upon meeting someone?

I was positive that Michelle or Emily would get the first impression rose, but it went to Ashley S.  Hmmm.  Did I miss something?  I was also shocked that everyone who did weird shit at the party got picked at the rose ceremony. Alli, Raichel, Jackie, Chantal, and Madison won roses in addition to Michelle, Kimberly, Emily, Keltie (the Rockette!), Ashley H., Meghan, Lisa M., Lindsey, Sarah P., Marissa, Brit, Stacy, Jackie, Melissa and Shawntel.

Michelle

The ending preview of the season was very interesting. I studied it closely, and there appeared to be a lot of dark headed girls making it to later dates.  I was disappointed to not recognize Emily, but that could be due to clever editing. I’ll admit, I’m hooked.  Right now my front runner is Michelle. She’s a little older, more experienced, and sultry-sexy.  He seemed to be taken with her from the get-go.  What were your impressions of the show and the contestants?

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One Response to “ Television Recap: ‘The Bachelor’ Season Premiere ”

  1. Maya on January 5, 2011 at 1:03 am

    You’re making me want to watch! Well, maybe the weird people got picked because they were actually charming, but the show just didn’t show that part. Who knows? He’s a lucky guy, but I feel like it’s hard to really fall in love under these circumstances. Also when there are other pretty faces around.

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