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Crabby Girlz ‘Scopes of the Week

December 7, 2009
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crab cartoon Aries [March 21-April 19]

Looks to be a good week for that long winter’s nap. Tylenol PM is your best friend. Your chaser is your choice.

Taurus [April 20-May 20]

Keep your friends close and your enemies close enough to piss off.

Gemini [May 21-June 20]
The lights are on, but nobody’s home. So go ahead, jimmy the lock and drink from their liquor cabinet.

Cancer [June 21-July 22]
Relax this week. Put your feet up – but not in a compromising position.

Leo [July 23-Aug 22]

Keep your eye on the prize. And, when no one’s looking, put your hands all over it.

Virgo [Aug 23-Sept 22]

Someone’s been looking down their nose at you. Turn yours up at them.

Libra [Sept 23-Oct 22]

Put your best foot forward this week. Good excuse for a pedicure, eh?

Scorpio [Oct 23-Nov 21]
Chill with a acquaintance. Know that they won’t warm up to you if you act cold.

Sagittarius [Nov 22-Dec 21]

You’re the apple of someone’s eye. Too bad he’s such a worm.

Capricorn [Dec 22-Jan 19]

What’s love got to do with it? Lucky for you, nothing.

Aquarius [Jan 20-Feb 18]

When you get a wild hair this week, pluck it.

Pisces [Feb 19-Mar 20]

If the pillow talk is weak this week, opt for smothering over snuggling.

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