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Crabby Girlz ‘Scopes of the Week

November 16, 2009

crab cartoon Aries [March 21-April 19]

When one door closes this week, another one opens. Don’t get your fingers stuck in one while you’re putting your foot in the other. If you do, swear like a sailor.

Taurus [April 20-May 20]

Indulge while out with friends, but not so much you divulge all of your details. Or vomit in public – because no one’s going to hold your hair.

Gemini [May 21-June 20]

You’re a ray of light, but others find your refracting distracting. No matter, shine on – in their face. Better their retnas burning than yours.

Cancer [June 21-July 22]

Someone’s been preying on you, but it’s your moves that are killer. Sink your teeth in.

Leo [July 23-Aug 22]

Don’t take someone for granted, just take them. Go ahead and use – just don’t abuse.

Virgo [Aug 23-Sept 22]

Stand up for yourself. Shoulders back, chin up, chest out. Waaaay out. Nice.

Libra [Sept 23-Oct 22]

A little hocus pocus can lead to a lot of hanky panky. Let the magic happen.

Scorpio [Oct 23-Nov 21]

If you talk the talk, be prepared to walk the walk. And, by the way, you might also prepare to say the alphabet backwards – and maybe even take a breathalizer test…

Sagittarius [Nov 22-Dec 21]

Life hands you lemons this week – so make lemonade. It’ll toss you a few limes, too – so line up some tequilia shots for that one.

Capricorn [Dec 22-Jan 19]

You’re quite the miss smarty pants this week. Wear your title well. When explain anything to anybody, dumb it down. They’re probably too stupid to notice anyway, so enjoy it.

Aquarius [Jan 20-Feb 18]

Someone is airs your dirty laundry this week. Drag them through the mud and see how they like it.

Pisces [Feb 19-Mar 20]

Life is good this week. But it could be better. Spend some time thinking about how much it actually sucks.


One Response to “ Crabby Girlz ‘Scopes of the Week ”

  1. anncine on November 16, 2009 at 11:54 am

    Duly noted, signed-Taurus.