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Halloween Costumes for Every Taste Level

October 29, 2009

By Renee

As a costume expert—I feel comfortable using the term “expert” because of the debt I’ve acquired while pursuing my Masters in costume design—I always view Halloween as a sort of personal challenge…yeah I see you over there Halloween, looking all smug and bored.  Your smirk seems to say “I’ve seen it all, hit me with your best shot”  (and the role of Halloween will now be played by Pat Benatar in this daydream scenario) and I will Halloween, I WILL!

So in an effort to show Halloween that I’ve still got it, here are this year’s suggestions for kick-ass costumes:

  • pat_benatar_leggingsPat Benatar- Ok here’s the thing, I don’t really especially like or dislike Pat Benatar. As a kid my Uncle Rick gave me a boom box and two cassette tapes for my seventh birthday.  I listened to the Pat Benatar tape once or twice, before Best of Blondie stole my heart.  So I can take or leave PB, but since she’s now my subconscious’s official personification of Halloween, I think the first spot on my list is fitting.  AND what could be more fun than cutting up a t-shirt, throwing on a pair of leggings, a wide belt and running around all night singing into an unplugged microphone? And yes I’m speaking to the male readers.

  • glee-castGleeks- Glee is such Halloween gold I don’t even know where to start.  My top pick would have to be Sue Selvester, a tracksuit, a short blonde wig and a lot of snarky attitude and you’re done.  Or what about dressing up as Kurt, circa ”Single Ladies” with backup dancers (or EVEN better,  backup football players!)

  • Taylor-Swift-Kanye-WestTaylor Swift and Kanye West (I am not endorsing blackface.)- The best couple costume this year has to be Taylor and Kanye, following his interruption of her VMA acceptance speech. And if you really want to get creative, turn it into a group costume, complete with an embarrassed Beyonce and Obama in an “I’m with Jackass ” shirt.

  • I Am T-Pain- Going as rapper T-Pain not only means a kick-ass entourage and questionable fashion choices, it also means iphone apps.  And what’s better than Halloween with autotune… “Can I have some Caaaa-a-aaa-a-a-andy?”

  • infant-hallowee…9559-758437Monkey Baby- Monkey Babies are THE pet of 2009, and what better time to cash in on it then this Halloween? The hard part is finding an old lonely lady to parade you around asking people for candy.

  • IMG_2140PK Swats- When all else fails, take whatever pet you have lying around and simply drape it over yourself. * Wearing your pet (in my case that would be my cat PK Swats) not only offers perhaps the laziest costume solution it also offers an instant conversation starter “hey nice pussy!”  And if someone tries to splash you with red paint for wearing fur, you can say with pride “my costume’s still alive, THANKS”.

*Renee Garcia and cannot be held liable for any accidents or injuries caused by wearing an animal as a costume.  If you do indeed wear your pet as a costume, you’ve brought it on yourself.


4 Responses to “ Halloween Costumes for Every Taste Level ”

  1. Rebecca on October 29, 2009 at 2:00 pm

    Never a dull moment or article. Love you!

  2. Renee on October 30, 2009 at 1:17 am

    I fully expect to see you dressed up as a monkey baby for trick or treating this year.

  3. Rebecca on November 23, 2009 at 12:43 pm

    I didn’t dress up nor did I get any candy. Hmmm

  4. Renee on November 23, 2009 at 6:41 pm

    There’s always next year.