Foreign Correspondunce: The View

No seriously, I’m BIG in Ireland

By Jenna

The following began as an ode to Stanley Kubrick.  And by ‘the following’ I don’t mean this post, I mean the events that I am going to relay.  I suppose I should have more reverence for Kubrick, but mostly he occupies that space in my mind reserved for directors about whom I realize are a big deal, but I’d rather not stretch myself in trying to figure out why.  Right, so the brilliance that is my friend Annie was called upon to submit a piece for a group show inspired by the films of Kubrick.  Annie immediately hatched a concept involving The Shining, me and Photoshop.  Her piece, 30 Years Later (Fig. A), ended up looking like this:

(Fig. A, author on the left, and the right)

As you can see, Annie, much to her credit, managed to make me look even more deranged than usual.  Kudos.

The show opened a couple of weeks ago and I was hardly surprised to find that Annie’s piece was one of three that I, in my infinite wisdom on such subjects, deemed not only well-conceived, but well-executed.  The rest, crap.

The curator of the show has quite a talent for P.R.  The show has received a great deal of coverage, more than perhaps it is worthy of.  However, this is where my story really takes off.  Dublin has a televised weekly review programme entitled, The View.  I’ve seen it once or twice.  It involves four panellists sitting around a table discussing what they think is good and bad on the film/theatre/literature/et. al. scene whilst maintaining a stony poker face.  They end up looking something like this (Fig. B):

(Fig. B The View panellists try to psych each other out)

Why they have not called upon my services I’m sure I can’t say, as my poker face is indeed a marvel, some say on par with Woodrow Wilson.  However, since they have recently reviewed ‘Taming Light’, my unintended audition might sway them.  I give you Figures C-E:

(Fig. C. ‘Introducing our 5th and 6th panellists)

(Fig. D. ‘I don’t think my mic is on.’)

(Fig. E. ‘I totally agree.’)

For a viewing of my massive and unhinged visage floating in space, you can go here:

http://www.rte.ie/tv/theview/ and click on the clip for ‘Taming Light’.  How these people weren’t totally weirded out by double me looming in the background I just don’t know.  It appears, however, I was completely ready for my close-up.

Annie’s photo:  10/10

My floating head:  9/10

The exhibition: ‘Taming Light’:  4/10

The View’s failure to mention Annie’s name, the piece on view OR the creepy model: 0/10