Foreign Correspondunce: The View
No seriously, I’m BIG in Ireland
The following began as an ode to Stanley Kubrick. And by ‘the following’ I don’t mean this post, I mean the events that I am going to relay. I suppose I should have more reverence for Kubrick, but mostly he occupies that space in my mind reserved for directors about whom I realize are a big deal, but I’d rather not stretch myself in trying to figure out why. Right, so the brilliance that is my friend Annie was called upon to submit a piece for a group show inspired by the films of Kubrick. Annie immediately hatched a concept involving The Shining, me and Photoshop. Her piece, 30 Years Later (Fig. A), ended up looking like this:
As you can see, Annie, much to her credit, managed to make me look even more deranged than usual. Kudos.
The show opened a couple of weeks ago and I was hardly surprised to find that Annie’s piece was one of three that I, in my infinite wisdom on such subjects, deemed not only well-conceived, but well-executed. The rest, crap.
The curator of the show has quite a talent for P.R. The show has received a great deal of coverage, more than perhaps it is worthy of. However, this is where my story really takes off. Dublin has a televised weekly review programme entitled, The View. I’ve seen it once or twice. It involves four panellists sitting around a table discussing what they think is good and bad on the film/theatre/literature/et. al. scene whilst maintaining a stony poker face. They end up looking something like this (Fig. B):
Why they have not called upon my services I’m sure I can’t say, as my poker face is indeed a marvel, some say on par with Woodrow Wilson. However, since they have recently reviewed ‘Taming Light’, my unintended audition might sway them. I give you Figures C-E:
For a viewing of my massive and unhinged visage floating in space, you can go here:
http://www.rte.ie/tv/theview/ and click on the clip for ‘Taming Light’. How these people weren’t totally weirded out by double me looming in the background I just don’t know. It appears, however, I was completely ready for my close-up.
Annie’s photo: 10/10
My floating head: 9/10
The exhibition: ‘Taming Light’: 4/10
The View’s failure to mention Annie’s name, the piece on view OR the creepy model: 0/10