Jousting with the Germans
Recently, I’ve been flattered and granted permission to expand on my choice in Frothy topics (thanks Shannon, you’re pretty). So, I’ll be takin’ this opportunity to dig up and deliver some dirt on yours truly. That is, until I purchase my next pair of pumps which whimper to be written about.
When I was eighteen I made nice with a German exchange student who was probably one of my best counter parts, as far as criming partnerz go. Actually, having just spoken with said German Boy, I can easily confirm our existing status as the States/Deutschland MOD Squad.
Towards the end of this month, I’ll be on my way to das Motherland to visit my pal as he ventures down the virtual wedding aisle to join forces with his lovely bride-to-be. Or, something along those lines. At any rate, beer will be tapped, men will be used.
Here’s a list of the naughty/dangerous/beatnik/all-around rowdy behavior Tobias and I used to delight in (no particular order, kiddies, all dependant on the choice of booze for the evening):
- Hitting up Taco Bell around mid-night & dining over to Saginaw, Michigan’s, Oakwood Cemetery.
- Kickin’ it with Dire Straights & Janis Joplin down the laughable ‘main drag’ of Saginaw whilst practicing the correct way to avoid exchanging glances with potential gang members. (Oooo, Saginaw’s vewry skewry ‘gang’ population.)
- Skipping down the hallway singing out Spanish conjugations for all our fellow students to enjoy.
- German Techno, the Boss, & Piano Man. (Sound like the Lawrence Welk Show on speed? Bin-go.)
Now, here’s a list of our plans during my upcoming holiday with Tobias:
- Please see above list, replacing Michigan landmarks with ‘De lieber! Who knows where we’ll end up & why!’
In preparation for this trip, I am attempting (and I use that word to its very loosest) to think ahead about German culture and what I believe I should know. Tobias, on the other hand, while graciously noting my concerns has assured me I needn’t fret. My anxieties pooh-poohed by the results of our recent exchange:
S: I feel as though I should learn a bit of German so I don’t sound like a freakin’ fool while I’m across the pond.
T: Don’t bother; we’ll be all over the map during your visit. You’ll basically be between Dutch and German and trying to speak Dutch is like talking with a hot potato in your mouth.
T: I know you’re into shoes, but we may not have time to go a’hunting.
S: S’alright. I’ve been to London, they have fab-o shoes there.
T: Well played.
S: I heard I’ll be seated at the same table as your Brother, that should be cool!
T: Who told you that? Did I tell you that? Not true, but you’ll be seated with a bunch of really cool English speaking guests. One of my closest friends will be next to you, and he’s single, and one of my other cool friends, also single, will be on your other side. Another neat friend will be at your table, too, and he’s gay!
S: Thanks for looking out for me…snicker.
T: Putting together table settings for a wedding is a pain. It’s so hard to know who will want to converse with whom. Plus, people keep cancelling and the settings need to be re-arranged.
S: My friend, you can sit people till the booze runs dry and it won’t make a difference. They will all move their place cards to other tables when it comes time to eat.
T: No, no, there is a board with the names and tables on it. If someone changes tables we’ll know!
S: Doesn’t matter. Trust me, I’ve photographed enough of these affairs to know.
T: Darn it!
S: So, you’re going to see Springsteen, eh?
T: Already saw him twice this past week. It was fabulous. If I could put a down payment for assurance that I’ll look that good at that age…Hey! Maybe we’ll go to a concert while you’re here! (I’ll be in Germany a little under a week and the probability of attending a concert is ridiculously timed and totally do-able IF one is part of the States/Deutschland MOD Squad.)
So, I’ve started to realize cultures in the US & Germany probably aren’t going to be too far of a stretch. At least not among my chum, his family, and friends whom I’ll bet are wonderful people in general. Rest assured, I’ll be returning to the States toting stories of a whirlwind tour through ‘the Other Europe’, potential bachelor party documentation, a new favourite beer, and lots o’ photographs showcasing one of my best pals getting’ hitched. And won’t that be fabulous, dah-link.