These are a few of my favorite things (when I’m hungover)
by Janey Pancake
There are a handful of movies that I will watch no matter what – if they happen to be on television. These movies are like presents when they air – I don’t have cable, so I am usually out of town or staying with friends when I chance upon them and this factor contributes to my heightened enjoyment of them. They are particularly good when a person is nursing a hangover. Partake of a light breakfast (black coffee and a Sidecar) and behold the splendor:
Van Helsing – admittedly, this movie is terrible – but my love for Vampires and Werewolves is thick as thieves and I am willing to overlook some silly costumes and wigs for a film that combines them. Also, as a bonus (if only for me) it recently came to my attention that Will Kemp – who portrays Velkan Valerius, a werewolf in Van Helsing – can also be found in Step It Up II: The Streets as dance instructor Blake Collins at the Maryland School of the Arts! Crossover genre double-trouble!
Big Trouble In Little China – Sweet Sausage Sandwich. I love watching this movie under any circumstances…why? You may ask…because it is magnificent. The roles of the leading-man-action-hero and the comical side-kick are transposed here and it is wonderful. Truly.
Clue – I love this movie sooooo much. There are flames, flames on the side of my face.
Deep Blue Sea – There is no shortage of pay-off in viewing this movie. A big-name, high-profile actor dies spectacularly. A mortally injured man (who is strapped to a gurney attached to a helicopter which is trying to air-lift him to a hospital) survives long enough to be ripped from the sky by a genetically modified shark. The shark then takes him deep underwater, still attached to the gurney and breathing from an oxygen cylinder – and hurls him into an underwater research station like a battering ram! Thomas Jane is in it as well. I once had a dream that Thomas Jane asked me to marry him and I had to refuse his proposal because I couldn’t be Jane Jane.
Teen Witch – There is a rap battle, here: video.
No doubt you have heard by now, Bea Arthur passed away this weekend. I am hardly the right person to give her the loving tribute she so richly deserves, but I would be remiss if I didn’t mention her passing. I am pleased to say that I am too young to remember her starring role in Maude – I got to know Bea through her portrayal of Dorothy Zbornak on The Golden Girls (which, coincidentally, is a wonderful show to enjoy while you are nursing a hangover). I’m having cheesecake in your honor, Pussycat.
Editor’s note-Regrettably I have seen Deep Blue Sea at least 20 times, and any time I run across it on cable I am transfixed by its glorious awfulness. I hope it is on this weekend. Final note-that man strapped to the gurney was none other than Stellan Skarsgard. Seriously.